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Question From: Struggling to keep my cool during back-to-school
My kids have had a good transition back-to-school. I'm the one who is struggling. As if the crazy fall schedule wasn't enough (sports, activities and fitting in family time) now we have the dreaded homework time to deal with. I find myself overwhelmed with trying to keep three kids on task. I am exhausted by the time we sit down to tackle homework so I find myself snapping at the kids instead of offering support. Any advice?
My kids have had a good transition back-to-school. I'm the one who is struggling. As if the crazy fall schedule wasn't enough (sports, activities and fitting in family time) now we have the dreaded homework time to deal with. I find myself overwhelmed with trying to keep three kids on task. I am exhausted by the time we sit down to tackle homework so I find myself snapping at the kids instead of offering support. Any advice?
Advocates for Children Answers: It’s wonderful to hear that your children are making a good transition back to school! As a parent, please know that you are not alone in feeling tired and stressed by the end of the day. First ask yourself, “Are the after school activities reasonable or is it just too much for everyone?” If you feel the activities are manageable, then having a routine each day may help. In fact, having a homework routine is the number one suggestion made by the National Association of School Psychologists. According to the NASP website, “Tasks are easiest to accomplish when tied to specific routines. By establishing daily routines for homework completion, you will not only make homework go more smoothly, but you will also be fostering a sense of order your child can apply to later life, including college and work.” (For more, click here. )
The challenge for all parents today is how we can help our children become successful learners. How do we create an atmosphere in our home that values learning in all ways, homework included? After you have set up a routine and a designated homework area the next step is to learn how to “coach” your children to be independent learners.
Before your children begin their homework do a quick assessment together to see which child has an assignment that only needs minimal guidance from you to begin, and then encourage the child to work independently.
Before your children begin their homework do a quick assessment together to see which child has an assignment that only needs minimal guidance from you to begin, and then encourage the child to work independently.
You can also use the ‘daily homework planner’ to help your children set goals for that evening’s homework assignments (see link below). When looking at each assignment with your child ask questions like:
- What parts do you understand?
- Can you give me an example?
- What do you think the answer is?
- How could you find out?
This is a great time to foster cooperation as well. Can an older child be in charge of helping a younger sibling? Can two children work together to complete similar assignments, allowing you the freedom to work with the child that needs the most help that evening?
Finally, make sure your child is organized enough to focus on their homework assignment. According to the free ebook ‘The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose’ many school aged children struggle with disorganization, which can make homework time even more frustrating for you and your child. The ebook stresses parent guidance by saying “If you want a behavior, you have to teach a behavior. If you want your child to be organized, you have to invest the time to help your child learn an organizational system. Your job is to teach the system. Your child’s job is to use it.” (For more, click here.)
Want more ideas? Advocates For Children is offering “Parents On Board: Help your Child be a more Successful Student” Saturday, September 27th, 9:00 am–12:00 noon. This workshop will tackle the question above and more. For more information please call 783-3990.
Check us out at www.advocatesforchildren.net or on Facebook.
For the homework planner click here.
